The Nurse's Reunion Wish (HQR Medical Romancel) Page 4

  She did a quick about-turn when she saw Dominic, and May, who he knew liked to make a fuss of her staff when she could, halted her.

  ‘Don’t be daft,’ May said. ‘How do you have it?’

  White with one sugar, Dominic was tempted to answer.

  ‘White, no sugar,’ Rachel said.

  So she had given up that pleasure.

  May turned to Dominic. ‘How’s young Thomas doing?’

  ‘Stable,’ Dominic said. ‘Which is a hell of a lot better than he was a couple of hours ago.’

  ‘Indeed,’ May agreed. ‘Would you like some tea?’

  ‘Aye,’ he answered in a thick northern accent. ‘But none of that namby-pamby herbal stuff...’

  May gave a slightly bemused smile, because of course she didn’t get the private joke that had once existed between them: Rachel had been in a camomile tea phase, and Dominic, who had been strictly a coffee drinker, had unwittingly made camomile tea for her dad when he’d dropped by their flat.

  ‘What the bloody hell is this?’ Dave Walker had said as he’d spat it out.

  Yes, he’d thought Dominic a pansy who drank namby-pamby herbal tea.

  Dominic looked over at Rachel, to see if they might share a private smile, but she was staring hard at the television on the wall and continued to stare at it even as May headed to the kitchen and they were left alone.

  ‘Aren’t you going to say hello, Rachel?’ Dominic asked.

  * * *

  ‘Hello.’

  Rachel turned and looked at him, but couldn’t help her eyes drifting from his dark eyes to his jaw, to his mouth.

  His mouth had always enthralled her.

  The mouth that had kissed every inch of her skin.

  ‘How have you been?’ she asked.

  But it was clear Dominic wasn’t going to answer that here.

  ‘Do you want to meet for a drink? Clear the air and catch up?’

  ‘No, thanks.’ She shook her head, but then, worrying that she’d appear petty, and knowing they had to have this conversation at some point if they were going to be able to work in the same hospital, she changed her mind. ‘Actually, a quick catch-up might be good.’

  ‘There’s a pub across the road from the hospital,’ Dominic suggested. ‘I should finish around six—’

  ‘My lunch is at one,’ Rachel interrupted. ‘If you want to speak we can meet then.’

  ‘I am not doing this in the canteen.’

  And neither would she be going to a pub with him.

  Those days were long since gone.

  ‘It’s not as if we’re going to be holding hands across the table, Dominic,’ Rachel said, but then she questioned her own wisdom. After all, she wanted this kept well away from work.

  But Dominic was already nodding.

  ‘I’ll do my best to be there,’ he replied, rather tartly.

  They fell into silence as May came in with a tray of drinks and a huge coffee-and-walnut cake which she had brought from home. Dominic fell upon it immediately, and devoured his slice in a few bites.

  He’d always been hungry, Rachel recalled.

  ‘Will you have a piece, Rachel?’ May offered.

  ‘Not for me, thanks.’ She was struggling to hold her mug of coffee, let alone negotiate eating cake.

  ‘Oh, while I’ve got you, Dominic...’ May chatted on as she cut the cake. ‘The Emergency Department are having a night out for all those who worked at Christmas and couldn’t make the do.’

  ‘That would be me,’ Dominic said.

  ‘So, shall I put you down?’ May asked as she handed him a second generous slice. ‘We haven’t finalised where just yet.’

  ‘I’m not sure...’ Dominic said, and then glanced over to Rachel, who was back to staring at the television screen. ‘I’ll check my roster and let you know.’

  ‘You’ve already put your name down, haven’t you, Rachel?’ May said, taking out a list from her pocket and reading through it. ‘That’s right—Rachel, plus one.’ May smiled. ‘It will be lovely to meet your fiancé. What’s his name again?’

  The air seemed to have been sucked out of the room. ‘Gordon,’ Rachel said rather flatly.

  ‘That’s right—Gordon.’ May nodded, but then frowned as Dominic abruptly stood up. ‘Where are you going in such a hurry? Don’t you want that second piece of cake?’

  ‘I’ve got to see that COPD patient.’ He clipped out the words as he stalked off.

  Rachel fought not to turn her head at his rapid departure and continued to stare at the television screen.

  Oh, dear...oh, dear...oh, dear...

  CHAPTER THREE

  IN AN EFFORT to save money for the wedding, Rachel had brought her own packed lunch to work. Sitting in the canteen, she peeled the lid off her sandwich box and stared at the slice of frittata that Gordon had made. They’d spent Sunday cooking at home, preparing for the week ahead, with Rachel telling herself that she’d soon get the swing of this new domesticity and that it was exactly what she wanted.

  Her mind crept back to long-ago Sundays, lazy café breakfasts and making love in the afternoon...

  The frittata didn’t appeal, but perhaps that was because she was too nervous about speaking with Dominic to feel hungry. She regretted suggesting the canteen, but a cosy catch-up in the pub had felt too hard at the time. This way they’d just look like two hospital workers sitting at the same table.

  That was all they were now.

  She scanned the canteen and saw Dominic lining up to pay for his lunch. She put on her best poker face as he made his way over.

  ‘Rachel,’ Dominic said as he approached the table.

  How odd, she thought, to hear her name from his lips. ‘Dominic,’ she responded politely and attempted a smile, but her mouth flat-lined like an asystole cardiac arrest and there was nothing she could do to revive it.

  The huge roast beef baguette, the slice of cheesecake and mug of coffee on the tray that he plonked down on the table in front of him indicated that the prospect of lunch with his ex-wife hadn’t interfered with his appetite.

  As if to further cement that fact, he took from his pocket a bar of chocolate and put that down on the table too.

  ‘Hungry?’ Rachel commented.

  ‘Always.’ He nodded and glanced at her sandwich box. ‘What are you having?’

  It was easier to speak about their food than their past. ‘Frittata.’

  ‘Quiche without the best bit?’ Dominic said, and briefly screwed up his nose at her choice of lunch. ‘So, what brings you to The Primary?’

  ‘I could ask the same of you,’ Rachel said. ‘I had no idea you wanted to be a doctor...’

  ‘Well, you wouldn’t have,’ Dominic clipped. ‘It’s not as if you kept in touch.’

  ‘Neither did you.’

  She took a swift gulp of water to dilute the surge of venom that threatened to lace her voice, because it still galled, still burnt, still hurt that he had left without so much as a backward glance.

  ‘So, how have you been?’

  ‘I can’t complain.’ He put down the baguette he had started eating. ‘Look, this is awkward, I know...’

  ‘I don’t feel awkward,’ Rachel refuted. ‘I’m just taken aback to find you working here.’

  ‘Same.’ He nodded. ‘Especially as you always said you’d never leave Sheffield.’

  Location had been a bone of contention between them. A born-and-bred Yorkshire girl, she had said she never wanted to leave, whereas Dominic had never wanted to be there in the first place.

  ‘I was eighteen when I said that,’ she pointed out coldly.

  ‘True,’ he conceded, then took another bite of his baguette.

  Rachel sneaked a closer look. His hair was more tousled than this morning, and he looked more like the Dominic she’d
once known. He was different in other ways, though. She noticed the little fan of lines beside his eyes, and there was already a shadow to his jaw when there hadn’t been one this morning. The Dominic she had married had only shaved once a week. She noticed, too, the arrogant edge to him that hadn’t been there before.

  ‘We all say stupid things when we’re young,’ Rachel added.

  ‘We do,’ Dominic agreed, and their eyes properly met and held for the very first time since their unexpected reunion. ‘You didn’t answer my question, Rachel,’ Dominic said, still holding her gaze. ‘What brings you here?’

  It was Rachel who flicked her eyes away. ‘My fiancé got a transfer and...well, nursing’s pretty portable.’

  ‘So when’s the wedding?’

  ‘We haven’t set a date yet,’ Rachel said.

  ‘You’re living together?’ he asked, then retracted his question. ‘Sorry, that’s none of my business.’

  ‘Yes,’ she said—because, yes, it was none of his business, but also, yes, she and Gordon were living together. Well, they had been for all of ten days...

  ‘How long have you been together?’

  ‘Nearly three years now.’

  ‘Oh.’

  He looked as if he were about to say something else, but then changed his mind and took a huge bite of his baguette instead. He chewed carefully and then swallowed, but it must have stuck a little in his throat because he took a slug of his drink and then offered a comment.

  ‘You’re not exactly rushing into things, then?’

  ‘I did that once,’ Rachel responded tartly, and saw a small flicker of a smile on his mouth.

  His mouth.

  Yes, that one.

  And this time she could not haul her thoughts away. They had taken each other to bliss over and over and over and, although it scared her to admit it even to herself, she had never quite found that bliss again.

  ‘How’s the family?’ Dominic asked.

  ‘Much the same.’ Rachel nodded. ‘Well, bigger. There are a lot of nieces and nephews. How’s yours?’ she asked.

  ‘I don’t see an awful lot of them. I haven’t really since...’ He swallowed. ‘Well, they didn’t exactly help matters.’

  They had cut him off at the knees when Dominic had married her. They hadn’t even sent a card, let alone attended the wedding. She looked up at the man who had, despite his family’s strong objections, once stood by her.

  ‘They’re back living in London,’ he said, ‘but we just catch up at Christmas...things like that.’

  ‘I’m sorry you fell out because of us.’

  He smiled grimly. ‘Don’t take all the credit—it honestly wasn’t down to you.’

  ‘I ought to get back soon,’ Rachel said, packing up her sandwich box.

  ‘But we haven’t caught up.’

  ‘What is there to say, Dominic?’ She gave a helpless shrug. ‘What do you want to know?’

  ‘Are you happy?’

  He asked as if it mattered. And she answered as if she were certain.

  ‘Yes.’

  Except she hadn’t really paused to examine it of late. Her relationship with Gordon had progressed much more slowly than the hurtling freight train of her and Dominic.

  Of course she was happy, Rachel told herself.

  Okay, maybe she wasn’t as deliriously happy as she had been in the early days with Dominic, but she’d been a teenager back then, and flooded with a cocktail of hormones which had ensured she’d felt everything so much more acutely.

  His dark brown eyes were frowning slightly as he waited for her to elaborate on her state of happiness.

  ‘I’m very happy,’ she said finally. ‘Gordon and I both want the same things.’

  ‘What things?’ Dominic asked.

  ‘You know...a house, a family...’ Rachel’s voice trailed off. She was scared to ask herself if that was all that she wanted. ‘And you?’ she asked. ‘Are you happy?’

  ‘Yep,’ Dominic said, but did not elaborate.

  ‘You asked for this catch-up, Dominic,’ she pointed out, because he wasn’t exactly helping the conversation. ‘What is it you want to talk about?’

  ‘Okay, I’ll ask. Is it going to be a problem for you—us working together?’

  ‘Of course not.’ She smiled, but he did not return it. ‘Is it a problem for you?’

  ‘Yes.’

  She was taken aback by his directness. ‘Are you saying you want me to resign...?’

  ‘For God’s sake!’ he snapped.

  It was something she’d never seen him do before. She was starting to realise that Dominic was an entirely different beast now.

  ‘I’m not asking you to resign. I’m just trying to have an honest conversation, Rachel—but then, you were never very good at that.’

  ‘Meaning?’ Her hackles were rising—not that she let them show. ‘I never lied to you, Dominic.’

  ‘You never told the truth, though. I practically had to be a mind-reader to work out what you were thinking.’ He took in a breath—a long one—and gave it to her straight. ‘Yes, it’s a problem having my ex-wife working at the same hospital as me.’

  Oh!

  ‘And I don’t know how you’re going to react when...’ He didn’t finish.

  It looked as if Dominic wasn’t sure quite how to discuss his love life with Rachel.

  Or rather, his sex life.

  ‘Are you seeing anyone?’ Rachel forced herself to ask. ‘Because if it’s going to be an issue for her, then I can assure you—’

  ‘Them,’ Dominic said, and took another bite of his baguette.

  ‘Them?’ Rachel frowned.

  ‘What I mean is, I’m not seeing anyone seriously enough to bring an ex-wife into the equation.’

  ‘I see,’ Rachel said, even though she didn’t. She couldn’t imagine him playing the field.

  ‘I have no intention of getting involved with anyone or making any kind of commitment. I’m not very good at relationships,’ Dominic said, and gave her a slightly twisted smile. ‘Though I don’t have to tell you that.’

  ‘I’m not so sure,’ Rachel said. ‘We had...’

  She blew out a breath and tried to haul her mind back from the place it was dancing towards: the good times, the great times, the best of times.

  ‘It wasn’t all bad.’

  ‘It wasn’t all good.’

  And therein lay the difference between them.

  If she laid together the years of her life on a grid, then seventeen and eighteen would be tall towers that dwarfed the rest. Those two years with Dominic had been the utter highs.

  Yes, their future had sunk, and the bills had piled high, but when the light had been switched off, the door closed on the day, and it had been them...just them...

  ‘I don’t know how I feel about seeing you again,’ Dominic admitted. ‘I would really like to shrug...to say, It’s good to see you happy, Rachel. But I wouldn’t be telling the truth.’

  ‘Oh...’

  ‘I’m not going to lie and pretend I’m okay with this.’

  ‘I really don’t see the issue,’ Rachel said. ‘It was years ago. We’re different people now—well, you certainly are.’

  ‘Yes,’ he said. ‘I am.’

  * * *

  Dominic had had to reinvent himself after their failed marriage.

  Freshers’ Week? What a joke. He had looked around at the sea of happy faces, all excited to start the next phase of their lives, and all he had felt was wrung out.

  Everyone had been introducing themselves, getting to know each other. Would anyone want to hear that he was separated, with a divorce pending? That he was a father without a son and looking for a job in order to finish paying for the funeral.

  Ask about my gap year? Please don’t.

  He
hadn’t wanted to wade through that hellish time with strangers. He hadn’t wanted to get close to anyone when the one person he had wanted to get close to had completely shut him out.

  But instead of being entirely antisocial, as he’d wished to, he’d fallen into bar work to support himself and discovered the art of meaningless conversation—and, even better, meaningless sex.

  Apart from one maudlin night, when Dominic had lapsed and admitted the truth to Jordan and his wife, Heather, he’d let no one in—because there was nothing he wanted them to see.

  After a scare with another woman, despite being hyper-vigilant about birth control, Dominic had gone and got the snip to ensure it could never happen again—and he revelled in his infertility.

  As his ex-wife was probably about to find out.

  No, he did not want her here.

  ‘I could lie,’ he said suddenly, and flashed a smile and his white even teeth. ‘If that’s what you want me to do. Rachel, hello! It’s brilliant to see you!’ he exclaimed, and he knew there wasn’t even a trace of sarcasm to his tone—except he’d just told her that he didn’t mean a word of it. ‘Gordon seems so good for you.’

  She rolled her eyes.

  ‘It’s so nice to catch up!’ Dominic persisted with his taunt. ‘I’ve been dying to know what happened to you—’

  ‘Stop it!’ she snapped, and for the first time she let him glimpse that, despite her cool façade, she was struggling too. ‘You don’t have to outright lie,’ Rachel said. ‘But at the very least I’m sure we can manage to be professional and polite.’

  ‘That I can do.’

  ‘Good.’

  ‘But it goes both ways,’ Dominic warned her. ‘I mean it, Rachel. I expect the same from you.’

  ‘You’ll get it. I would never let my past interfere with my work.’

  Only perhaps she didn’t understand what he was saying—so Dominic made it clear. ‘Please don’t think that just because we were married for five minutes it gives you any licence to lecture me.’

  ‘Why would I lecture you?’

  ‘Maybe not lecture...’ Dominic said. ‘But I date, Rachel. I date a lot.’

  ‘That’s fine. It’s none of my business.’