Modern Romance May 2019: Books 1-4 Read online

  ‘Too sad?’

  Khalid never admitted weakness, not even to himself, but she assumed so rightly that it gave him pause.

  ‘Yes,’ he admitted.

  ‘And me,’ Aubrey said, then looked down at the menu, trying to work out what to have, except there were no prices.

  The pasta, she knew, would be the cheapest, or perhaps she could have a risotto. There was no hope of splitting the bill and she did not want to take advantage. And as Aubrey tried to work out what might be cheapest, Khalid spoke.

  ‘So, how did you...?’ He hesitated, not really wanting the answer, but the natural question was about Jobe. ‘How long were you and Jobe...?’ Khalid could not finish, his skin crawling at the very thought.

  Hearing this confident man waver, confused Aubrey for a second.

  And the next second, as realisation hit, his slight discomfort both shamed and devastated her.

  Very deliberately she didn’t look up from the menu. She just bit down on her bottom lip as she realised Khalid assumed that she and Jobe had been an item.

  She recalled again the word he had used when speaking about her and Jobe. Not relationship, but dealings.

  Khalid, Aubrey now realised, thought that she was a prostitute.

  He wasn’t the first to think so and no doubt he wouldn’t be the last. Hell, even her own mother assumed that she was one. But that he did hurt her.

  All that had been good about tonight felt as if it had been rearranged into a more sordid interpretation. She looked up, though not at Khalid; instead, her eyes swept the restaurant. She could see the glances in their direction and the attentive waiters, and wondered if everyone assumed the same.

  Khalid changed the subject then, not that Aubrey even heard what he said, such was the roaring in her ears. ‘Excuse me?’

  ‘I said that the music was pleasant.’

  ‘Y-yes,’ Aubrey stammered, but conversation was impossible now. ‘I might just use the restroom,’ Aubrey said, trying to keep the tremble out of her voice then standing and retrieving her purse.

  ‘Of course. Have you chosen what you want to eat?’

  ‘Er...’ While desperate to retreat, to get out on the street and first breathe and then run, instead she picked up the menu and experienced a curl of anger entwined with her shame as she scanned it. She had no intention of coming back, and hopefully by the time her meal arrived he would have more than worked that out, but first she would choose something. ‘Lobster Thermidor,’ Aubrey said, hoping that was as expensive as it sounded and that it might in some way pay for her hurt.

  But Khalid didn’t even blink at her choice.

  It felt as if all eyes were on her as she left the restaurant. Her heart was hammering in her chest and she was perilously close to breaking down but as she stepped out of the restaurant and into the foyer there was Brandy and the other women heading towards the bar. Aubrey didn’t want to be seen by anyone right now so, instead of walking out of the hotel, she fled to the restroom instead.

  It was gorgeous, of course. More like a luxurious dressing room with huge mirrors and deep crimson vanity chairs, and Audrey slumped into one and buried her burning face in her hands, going over and over the day.

  It was not an oversight or accident that she had been let into the funeral. The Devereuxes must have known about the monthly payments into her accounts and had assumed the worst.

  And Khalid did too.

  Was he expecting more from tonight? Was she to earn her cognac and lobster? But, no, Aubrey thought, her heart slowing down, whatever Khalid thought of her he had been nothing but nice.

  She said it over and over until her breathing slowed down.

  Even if he thought she was on the game, throughout the day and this night Khalid had been nothing but nice. He had invited her to dinner, and had said that afterwards his driver was taking her to the airport.

  She was forearmed now, because if that deal suddenly changed, she could slap him then.

  There was no need to walk out right now.

  For, so far, he had been nothing but nice.

  * * *

  ‘Okay?’ Khalid checked as Aubrey took her seat, for she was as pale as the tablecloth and did not meet his eyes.

  ‘I’m fine,’ Aubrey said, but though she had returned her guard was now up.

  ‘I ordered,’ Khalid said.

  ‘Thanks.’ Their drinks had arrived and she took a sip of it, feeling the burn as it went down. ‘What did you have?’ Aubrey asked, trying to keep the conversation light.

  ‘Pasta primavera,’ Khalid said. ‘It was the first meal I had when I first came to New York.’

  And it may well be his last.

  ‘I had no idea what to eat when I came here,’ Khalid elaborated, which was rare in itself, for he did not usually bother with sentimentality, but it was choking him tonight. ‘My mother had said to ask for that if I was unsure, and so I did.’

  ‘You studied here?’

  ‘That’s right—the last two years of school then to college, where I studied structural engineering. Where I live, the infrastructure is ancient, though not as bad as on the mainland. Still, there is a lot of new development now taking place.’

  ‘Where do you live?’ Aubrey asked.

  ‘Al-Zahan,’ Khalid said. ‘An island country in the Middle East.’

  ‘I’ve heard of it.’ Aubrey startled with recognition of the name. ‘One of the hospitality managers I know is hoping to get a position there when the new hotel opens. And then some performers I work with mentioned heading there too, then it was mentioned on the news...’ She gave a shake of her head. ‘I’d never heard of it until a few weeks ago but now it’s everywhere.’

  ‘That happens.’ Khalid smiled, for he understood what she meant. ‘Take the pasta primavera I have ordered—I had never heard of it, and it sounded exotic.’

  ‘Exotic?’

  ‘To me, yes. And on my first taste I was hooked. But then, on every menu there it was, every time there was an advert or a recipe, and I thought, How did I not know it existed...?’

  She forgot how angry she was for a second and laughed, but then the hurt filtered back as Aubrey worked out just why she kept hearing Al-Zahan mentioned. ‘It’s a Devereux hotel, isn’t it?’

  ‘Yes. The hotel is a joint venture between us—it’s not due to open until next year,’ Khalid explained, and told her about the plans for the hotel, though the fact he was a prince he kept out of it. ‘It’s a huge project—more than a hotel—really, there will be extravagant shows and entertainment. There is even to be a maternity suite on the hundredth floor.’

  ‘Get out!’ Aubrey smiled, and despite doing her best to hold back she still warmed to him.

  ‘No, really,’ Khalid said, but he broke off as their meals were served. For Aubrey there was a slight rush of guilt as she looked at her plate and saw the very expensive meal she had so tersely demanded. A whole lobster sat in its shell with a still bubbling sauce beckoning. The conversation remained paused as Aubrey took her first taste.

  It was rich and creamy and the lobster simply melted on her tongue. Aubrey couldn’t remember ever tasting something so divine.

  Or being in the company of someone who was the same.

  He asked about her family, and she said there was just her and her mom.

  ‘No brothers or sisters?’ Khalid checked.

  She shook her head, noticing that he didn’t broach what she did for work. ‘What about you?’

  ‘I have two brothers and one sister; they are all at school here.’

  ‘Are you close to them?’

  ‘Not really, they are much younger.’ And with much less expected of them. ‘I am meeting them tomorrow for high tea.’

  ‘Oh!’ Aubrey said. ‘That sounds very formal.’

  ‘Because I am formal,’ Khalid said, and usually that was all he would say, and the subject would be closed, yet he looked at her eyes, so clear and blue, and the softness of her smile as she waited for him to say more. He added little, but it felt like very much. ‘I am formal, so that they do not have to be.’

  ‘Well,’ Aubrey responded, ‘I like you formal.’ She did, she just did. Whatever his assumptions about her, she felt safe with this formal man who wore cufflinks to dinner and did not so much as touch her elbow when they walked. She liked how safe he made her feel. Safe enough to go to his hotel room. Safe. As if nothing and no one could harm her when he was near.

  And, as they still stared at each other, she wondered how it would feel to be held by him. And what she might do if he reached out for her hand.

  Her heart was thumping in her chest and she could feel heat spread on her neck. She looked at his closed mouth and, aware of her own now, wondered how it would feel on hers.

  She tore her eyes away and looked down at her nearly empty plate and she felt shaken and a bit confused because she had been so angry with him before. Yet anger felt a whole lot like want, Aubrey now knew, for she was hot and bothered, only nicely so. She did not know what to do with feelings so new and confusing so she finished what was left on her plate.

  ‘Th-this was b-beautiful,’ she stammered. ‘Thank you.’

  He looked after her there too, for her silverware was slung on the sides of her plate. And though he could eat more if he chose to, Khalid subtly taught her what to do. ‘I have had enough too.’

  He put down his knife and fork close together.

  She looked at her own rather messy plate and arranged her silverware to match his.

  ‘I’m glad you enjoyed it,’ Khalid said.

  She had.

  And not just the food and sumptuous surroundings. Now the anger had dimmed, she realised she had simply enjoyed his company.

  He did not flirt, in fact he made no effort to impress.

  Khalid simply did.

  It was that he made an effort for her. He had suggested a soft drink when he saw that she was struggling with the cognac. Little things. The nicest things. And when their closed silverware had the waiter remove their plates, he must have seen the slight disappointment on her face when he declined the dessert menu.

  ‘Go ahead, though,’ Khalid offered.

  ‘No, honestly, I’m full.’ Aubrey said, to be polite, but though she was full, she had also secretly wanted dessert, she just didn’t want to eat one without him.

  ‘Perhaps I will have one after all.’ Khalid said, and called the waiter to retrieve the dessert menu.

  She brought out the nice in Khalid, so much so that he ate halva ice cream, which he didn’t really want, while Aubrey sank her spoon into a pillow of dark chocolate soufflé.

  And he fought himself—fought not to take her hand or to accept a taste of her soufflé when she offered because Khalid did not indulge in such things.

  Not even for one night.

  ‘Is it nice?’ Aubrey asked of his dessert.

  ‘Very.’ Khalid nodded.

  Aubrey wished that he would ask for a taste, and not just so that she could then try his dessert. She wanted that small intimacy with Khalid.

  For the first time in her life, Aubrey wanted intimacy with another person.

  ‘Mine tastes like heaven,’ she said.

  ‘Good.’

  ‘What’s halva?’

  ‘It is a confectionery.’

  ‘And what does it taste like?’

  ‘Would you like me to order you some so that you can try?’ Khalid offered, deliberately misreading her cue.

  She inwardly sagged in disappointment and tried not to show it in her face. ‘No.’

  Khalid looked at her chocolate-coated lips and it would seem there was something more he now knew about Aubrey—she liked her desserts.

  ‘No, thank you,’ she added. ‘Because it would be a terrible waste when I only want to know what it tastes like.’

  He met her pleading eyes. ‘Then you must order it some time.’

  Aubrey watched as he scraped the last spoonful of ice cream from his bowl and she wanted to squirm in her seat because high between her legs she ached as she willed that spoon to be offered to her, but it wasn’t.

  Instead, Khalid did something better. He swallowed down the precious last drop of ice cream and instead of a taste of his dessert she got better—the caress of his smile as he looked deep into her eyes.

  It was as if the light of the chandelier overhead had surged, it felt as if the sun had come out on the dark New York City night.

  But then it faded and order returned to the sky.

  ‘I should go,’ Khalid said, for even from across the table she had got under his skin and he decided that their night was over. ‘I’ll have my driver take you to the airport.’

  ‘Thank you,’ Aubrey said.

  She didn’t mean it, though, for Aubrey did not want their time to end.

  They walked out of the hotel restaurant and passed the bar and she looked in for a wistful moment. Brandy and the other women were around the piano and, boy, could they sing.

  They were dressed now in sequins and kicking up their gorgeous long legs. Mom would have loved tonight, Aubrey thought. If only she had come, these women would have looked out for her mom as they would for her should she ask.

  They were a sisterhood really.

  ‘I am going to go up now,’ Khalid said. ‘Do you want to go in and join your friends?’

  ‘No.’ Aubrey shook her head as they resumed their walk through the foyer. The fact was she could go and join in and they would look after her. It actually didn’t have to be the airport floor. ‘Maybe.’

  ‘My driver can take you any time you like,’ Khalid offered.

  He had kept his word, Aubrey realised. It had been dinner, that was all.

  Except she didn’t want it to be all.

  It was Aubrey who wanted more and, despite what he thought her to be, it was everything else that he was—strong, sensual—that somehow made her feel safe.

  Some day in the future Aubrey would know her first, and it was something she had silently dreaded.

  Until now.

  He could never imagine the wrestle that took place in her as they walked past the bar. Khalid could not know she was a virgin and how new this all felt to her.

  All he responded to was the sensual air that surrounded them. ‘I’ll let the desk know now and then you can call for the driver whenever you are ready. Or,’ he added, for he could resist her no more, ‘you can come back to my suite.’

  Aubrey stopped walking and as the sun returned to the night sky, she turned to face Khalid. Aubrey had never so completely met another’s gaze before. If anything, she did her level best not to catch men’s eyes, yet she held his, totally.

  She saw the flecks of gold and the dark rim that seemed to hold inside it a circle of fire and he neither looked nor backed away from his invitation.

  ‘I’d like that,’ Aubrey said, for it was the truth. She wanted to be with Khalid, even if just for a night. She wanted him to be her first, yet he considered her way more experienced than she was. And if she told him her truth? Aubrey was rather certain that Khalid would politely wish her goodnight.

  And so she lied by omission and chose not to tell Khalid her truth, and as he moved in to kiss her, his eyes still did not look away. Aubrey could feel the warmth of his mouth even before their lips had met and both closed their eyes as they did, for there could be no other way to sample such exquisite bliss. He kissed her so lightly that if she opened her eyes Aubrey was scared that he might have disappeared. That he might be a dream. Yet his lips pressed a little more firmly and parted hers.

  Aubrey had truly never known a kiss, but even with nothing to compare it to she knew that his kiss was pure bliss. She could not have fathomed how, with such a gentle touch, her heart might tumble. It was as if he had found the weak spot within, the fracture line that, correctly tapped, might shatter her.

  And he felt it too.

  Tonight Khalid did not want the meaningless sex he survived on. He wanted to touch and to feel and for one night to fully indulge that. Today had been exceptionally hard—new grief and the resurgence of old grief had combined—but now there was a sweet reprieve and Audrey was the one he had found it with. She had consumed him on sight and it was a relief to finally hold her in his arms and kiss her lips as he wanted to.

  But then he removed his kiss, and his hands held her hips as he made sure that Aubrey was clear as to the nature of his invitation.

  ‘You understand that you won’t be sleeping in the guest room?’

  Oh, she did. Her lips ached for his and Khalid’s hands on her hips were necessary for they held hers slightly back and prevented them from melding into his, as they felt inclined to do, and so she answered him honestly. ‘I do.’

  ‘Then come to bed.’

  CHAPTER SIX

  THE DOOR TO his suite closed behind them.

  Then the bedroom door closed behind them too.

  ‘All day I have wanted you,’ Khalid said.

  ‘I’ve wanted you too,’ Aubrey admitted.

  He held her head in his palms and kissed her eyes, her cheeks, her face, then her mouth. She could never have guessed just how rare such tenderness was for Khalid. He showered her with kisses, lowering his head as Aubrey resisted scaling his chest. And when their mouths met there was heady relief as she tasted the air that he breathed as their tongues slowly mingled.

  His scent this close was intoxicating and she gave herself up to his kiss as he slipped down the zipper of her dress.

  Aubrey felt the brush of air on her back as he exposed her skin then the light touch of his fingers tenderly exploring the notches of her spine. She felt in his kiss the brief irritation as he came to her bra strap, and then the whisper of relief from both of them as he unclipped it and her skin was his to roam. Khalid peeled down the straps of her dress and that her bra was tatty didn’t matter for it was a mere inconvenient barrier that soon fell to the floor.

  Her dress went with it and Khalid went to remove his own clothes but Aubrey halted him.

  ‘Let me,’ she said, for she wanted finally to feel the silk of his suit beneath her hands and to expose the body that had transfixed her on sight. She pulled the jacket down his shoulders and felt for a moment his solid arms beneath the thick cotton of his shirt. It was Aubrey who removed his cufflinks. A far harder task than applying them for as she did his hands toyed with her breasts, stroking and caressing them. His palms were warm and his fingers a touch rough, making it almost impossible to concentrate on the task. Khalid lowered his head for a taste, and the coolness of his tongue and the soft sucking had her hold onto his shoulders merely to stay standing.